The Secret to Success

While it’s true you can’t always get what you want sometimes an opportunity presents itself in a manner that can result in the realization of all your hopes and dreams.  Let’s say you were once an elite member of your field or of your community but due to certain mistakes in judgment or the tide of life flowing against you, you lost your way.  You began to lose the respect you’ve worked so hard to gain.  I would imagine that it’ll be a little disheartening seeing people you once considered your peers accept the accolades that would have rightly been yours.  Now, imagine I offered you a path to redemption.  Imagine I gave you a way to be restored in the world’s eyes.  Imagine I offered you a fully mapped out, 3 part process that has already been proven to work for others.  Now imagine I said, all you have to do is follow it step by step, do not deviate, do not question or change anything and all you’ve lost will be given back to you.  What would you do?  I don’t think I’m going out on a limb to say that the majority of us will take this guide and run with it if it gets us back to that point where pride and purpose can be restored.  Unfortunately not everyone thinks that way… enter M. Night Shyamalan.

Last night I saw Avatar, sorry – The Last Airbender.  By the way, James Cameron I owe you an apology for yesterday’s rant but I can assure you that no one can ever confuse your movie with what I witnessed on screen.  I can honestly say with a resolute heart that The Last Airbender was one of, if not the outright worst movie I have ever seen.  Ever.  I’ve seen a lot of bad movies, a few from M. Night himself but this was crap on a whole new level.  Ten minutes into the movie I was ready to walk out.  I caught myself thinking that I was being overly critical because I’m a huge fan of the animated series.  After another ten minutes, I knew that was not solely the case.  Do I love the television series? Yes.  I thought it was brilliantly voiced, the animation was impressive for an American studio and the story was solid.  You felt for the characters.  You understood the bonds and the struggles.  You had your drama, you had your laughter, you felt Aang’s pain when Appa was taken from him (this didn’t happen in last night’s movie so consider it a spoiler).   This live action atrocity is so devoid of emotion that one can feel more attached to random names in a phone book, if you felt like reading it.  I’m going to ignore for a moment that this film was supposed to be based on that series and address it as a standalone for a bit.

There are so many things wrong with this film that I honestly don’t know where to start.  I’ll go with the writing.  Being a writer and someone who can appreciate a good story, the horrible dialogue within this movie sickened me.  Don’t judge me because I’ve got a little blog thing going here, I do this for fun.  My forte is Sci-Fi/Fantasy and I do it well.  The way these characters communicate with each other is as expressionless as the dumb looks on their faces.  One of the major flaws in the writing is that the lines seem counterintuitive with building a rapport with the audience.  Usually, if you have the protagonist give a rousing speech it’s a perfect blend of the actor’s ability and the script.  If the script is powerful it gives the actor something to feed and flow from to deliver his/her bit in a manner that the viewing public wants to see.  There was none of that.  Not a single character was able to relay a message on screen that was either believable or mesmerizing.  Even Aang who lost his entire people and is now the last of his kind is vapid of any real anything.  There is no connection with him at all and he’s supposed to be the main character.  We’re supposed to feel for him, cheer him on and suffer like he suffers because of what happened to the world due to his actions but we don’t.  Fact is, we don’t wind up caring about Aang at all.  We don’t wind up caring about any of the characters.  If the actors cannot create a bond on screen that seems genuine then it’s impossible for us to connect as well.  Those of us sitting in chairs looking for a rafter from which to hang ourselves, did not get that experience found within good movies of this genre.  What we did get however is a literary technique that writers refer to as “info dumping”.  While there are creative ways to have a character propel the story with a little background information when this is used randomly, excessively and at length it frustrates the viewer and generates a rift.  It also fuels the need for us to want to burn the theater down.

The acting, if one could call it that, left so much to be desired.  Ignoring the glaring miscasting you still cannot find a single person in this movie that was able to become their character.  Again, I’m not sure if this was caused by the level of bad writing found in this script but since they all had source material to pull from, all I can do is blame the actors and ultimately hold M. Night accountable.  It was painful to watch Dev Patel (Slumdog Millionaire) reduced to a 3rd rate extra on a set where it appeared no one knew what the hell was going on.  It’s not that he’s incapable of delivering lines or getting the audience to feel for his character, because he is.  His portrayal in this movie of Prince Zuko was, well… sad.  It’s really easy to acknowledge the strife and hurt within the Zuko character.  He’s the prince and only son of the Fire Lord who stood up for his friends who were about to be sent essentially on a suicide mission as a military tactic.  He voiced his opinion rather strongly and perhaps insolently in a war chamber meeting and the general took offense and challenged him to a duel.  On the day of that battle, when Zuko stepped out to face his opponent he did not find the general but instead his father standing before him.  Refusing out of respect to fight his father, the Fire Lord lashed out at his son to teach him a lesson for being weak.  This left Zuko with an irreparable burn on his face which serves as a constant reminder of his father’s disdain for him.  He was then banished and sent on a fool hearty mission to find the Avatar.  This is the only way he would be allowed back into his home territory and sit again in his father’s court.  This is fairly straightforward.  Tell me you cannot find a way to see what would drive Zuko to do the things he does.  Dev Patel has the ability to bring this on screen and make you feel it.  He has the ability to make you believe it.  So, what happened?  All signs point to what’s been happening with the village idiot known as M Night whose unbreakable trend of spitting out bad movies makes me wish I used my sixth sense to avoid this crapfest. 

Night, how dare you try and profess to the world that you are a visionary director, you pathetic hack.  Which part of your film school training gave you this ability to take something totally beautiful and defecate all over it?  It’s like shitting on a puppy, you just don’t do it!  How dare you promise the Avatar fans that you will stay true to the storyline and then deviate.  The path to victory was clear, all you had to do was translate the television series that we all loved into a version for the big screen.  Your inability to write a script is astonishing.  Your meager attempts at directing are eclipsed by your total disregard for audience satisfaction.  How could you feel good about what you unleashed on the world?  How can you sleep at night?  You betrayed fans of Avatar, you betrayed your fans who stuck up for you while you took our patience for granted and in the end you betrayed yourself.  Your goal was to become a world famous director who garnished the adoration and respect of your viewers and your peers.  That blank check that we’ve given you after The Village just bounced.  There’s only so much crap that one director can put out and still be taken seriously.  The Last Airbender is a horrible movie.  It should be studied for years and years as an example of how not to make a film.  Night, your film made me gay for a moment as I was seriously thinking of walking out and sneaking into Twilight Eclipse that was playing in the room next to ours.  What were you thinking?  How can you write a script so incredibly bad especially since one was handed to you in the form of 61 episodes of award winning goodness.  Yes, award winning!  The television series has won several:  Pulcinella, Annie, Genesis, Primetime Emmy, Golden Reel and even a Peabody award.  Night, this is inexcusable and you have forever in my mind destroyed whatever faith I had left in your ability as a creative force.  Your films are dead to me, pretty much as you are.

Please do not waste your money on this film.  It’s just terrible.  If you want to do something this weekend that’s more pleasurable, feel free to get a root canal.  For those of you who have seen it, eventually our hearts will heal… when Inception comes out.

By the way if you haven’t check out thedailyshaft.wordpress.com – it’s good stuff.

What would you do with 365 billion dollars?

The United States of America, birthplace of the automobile and with over 250 million registered it is a well known fact that we Americans love our cars.  We love the convenience, we love the thrill, and we love the power and pleasure of maneuvering a 2 ton beast down a winding road.  We love getting behind the wheel to run even the most simplest of errands about town.  We love washing our cars, well most of us anyway.  Coincidentally, it’s been over a month since you parked under that tree – why does your car still look like that!  We love pulling up at a stop light, looking over at the car next to us and knowing that once we see green we’re smoking it.  We love the comfort and ego stoking that an automobile brings us on that slow ride down the avenue where everyone standing on the corner notices us through little jealous eyes.  If nothing else, we Americans are a people of great pride.  With all that said, it is also a well known fact that we do not like to relinquish our rights, privileges or comforts for anything.  If our cars were powered by shoving live baby seals into the engine, we’d keep a few spare pups in the trunk for that ride to Atlantic City.  Sure, that sounds pretty silly but riddle me this: is that any less preposterous than our government spending 1 billion dollars a day on foreign oil?  Not a few dollars, not even a few million… but 1 billion dollars.  Over 365 Billion dollars a year?   I don’t know about you but that appears to be a decent amount of pocket change.

This week President Obama in a televised speech from the Oval Office did what he does best, captivate anyone listening to his words.  Yes America, there was more on television than the NBA finals which by the way, I’ve decided to abstain from caring about this time around.  See, I don’t particularly care for Kobe’s smug sense of arrogance and being a true New Yorker, I couldn’t care less about any Boston sports franchise.  What’s that?  The Lakers won?  Well then… 

Anyway, the President’s decision to address the nation from the most important desk in the world created an overall different tone to his speech.  If you’ve been following his oratory career from the Keynote address at the 2004 Democratic National Convention, Obama seems to thrive on the energy of the crowd.  Every cheer, every shout, every chant empowers him with a greater ability to command the audience.  Even the “you lie!” incident sparked something in his eyes that fired him up and to his credit he was able to maintain his dignity.  The racists made it their point to show that they have none.  This speech was something entirely different.  It was the first time he addressed the nation from this hallowed throne of power that typically has been used by predecessors to express a personal sentiment, bolster the nation’s resolve during dark times or inform the nation that war had been declared.  This week for about 18 minutes it was all three as the President set his sights on the Gulf disaster, BP, pushing his clean energy agenda and just like any good actor, sorry politician, he commanded the stage with ease.

Earlier that day President Obama vowed to the citizens of the Gulf Coast that all will return to normal.  Well, yes.  In time.  Given enough time the planet will eventually reset itself and remove the scars of pollution that its inhabitants blazed across the globe.  While people need to hear their commander in chief perform some measure of lip service, the residents of the coastline and anyone who earns a living from the sea need to stay realistic.  To this day we have not really been told of the amount of oil gushing from the well and with estimates as high as (and I cannot quote the source  for this number as I might have been a little inebriated when reading it) 60,000 barrels a day, one can only imagine the full depth this damage will cause.  Telling people that all will return to normal when staring at millions of gallons of oil with no end on the horizon to seal the leak itself, is politics – plain and simple. 

Most Americans are of the opinion that Obama’s administration has not taken enough steps to power this cleanup and not come down as hard as it should on BP.  In all fairness, Barack Obama is the President of the United States… not Kwame who summons Captain Planet with a magical ring.  I don’t exactly expect to see him in a row boat trying to skim the oil from the water using a giant spoon.  He did however get 20 billion dollars out of BP’s pockets, which I honestly feel is nowhere near enough to cover these losses.  Although I personally believe that this administration has yet to firmly stand for anything with a true sense of balls, I feel that given the sheer magnitude of this fiasco, it’s doing fairly well.  This environmental disaster is not Obama’s “Katrina”.  I have not been to the Gulf Coast to witness “the battle we’re waging against an oil spill that is assaulting our shores and our citizens.”  Like everyone else I’m at home watching cable television’s OCD coverage of the cleanup effort and it looks pretty busy.  I can’t tell who’s doing what but there appears to be activity – which is more than can be said for Bush’s Katrina… which was actually Katrina.

So, on Tuesday night with great gusto, Pres. Obama took his story to the people and interrupted some primetime television but what was really said?  Well, he mentioned that we as a nation face challenges, he referenced the recession, one line shout out to the war on Al Qaeda and then he started on the oil.  To deal with the disaster he assembled a crack team of engineers and scientists lead by Dr Steven Chu (US Secretary of Energy and a PhD in experimental physics).  Honestly, I feel better already knowing that we have an Asian scientist taking point on this project although short of opening up a wormhole and using a giant particle Hoover vacuum thing to suck the oil away, I’m unsure how practical his school of thought would be.  Sure glad he’s experimental then. 

The President then went into what he considers as a ”battle plan” for the cleanup effort.  Perhaps this language seems innocent but I believe his speechwriter is a genius.  The phrase “battle plan” is exactly what Americans on both sides of the aisle need to hear.  It appeals to our baser instincts, our need for a good fight – The war on oil!  We’re going to work on the recovery and restoration, we’re going to get some funds for those affected, we’re going to create new technology to prevent disasters like this from happening again and rah rah rah!  As usual I followed the speech in agreement and was excited to finally see some passion coming from the White House.  That was until he started on clean energy.  Now to be clear, I’m all for everything going green.  Greater fuel efficiency, the reduction of greenhouse gasses (not that global warming is real or anything) and limiting our carbon footprint are some of the things we as a civilized species should definitely be making strides towards.  My problem is when the need for clean, renewable energy sources is pedaled about like a circus act.  This shameless plug of his energy agenda while in the midst of the greatest environmental disaster we’ve faced since Crocs started overflowing landfills, seemed cheap.  It felt akin to a guy selling life jackets at the funeral of someone who drowned in a boating accident. 

“The tragedy unfolding on our coast is the most painful and powerful reminder yet that the time to embrace a clean energy future is now.”  Mister President I respectfully disagree.  The time to embrace a clean energy future was administrations ago.  If you don’t want to go that far back, what happened to the start of your presidency?  I wonder what cooled that “Change has come to America” fire that was on everyone’s bumper stickers.  I think the 15.9 million that BP spent last year lobbying for its interests possibly paid a part.  If not, then how about the 77 grand that BP directly handed Pres. Obama during his Senate/Presidential campaigns, making him the top recipient of BP PAC (Political Action Committee) and individual money.  According to the Center for Responsive Politics, BP ranks among the most powerful corporate forces in U.S. politics spending over 3.5 million dollars in federal campaign contributions.  And that’s just BP.  I’m pretty sure if we do some light research, maybe put Google to work on something other than World Cup results, we’d find a trend between sitting government officials and the energy giants.  I would think it hard to spank the people who pulled the strings to get you where you are today. 

The concept of clean energy and moving the country away from the oil moguls is a dream at best until we can stop and ask ourselves – can we really afford to be paying countries for our energy needs?  Most of these countries don’t even like us anyway but they’re sure happy to see an American Dollar well, one billion dollars to be precise.  Every single day.  It sickens me that we can’t seem to find the money for alternative research into cleaner energy sources.  Some might say that options like wind and solar are impractical as we would have to convert the entire state of Wyoming into turbines and solar cells.  With a greater budget, I’m sure this technology can be tweaked.  There’s hydroelectric, which could be re-imagined into something more potent.  The fact still remains that there are options we have not even thought of yet because the government has done such a wonderful job of maintaining our dependence on foreign oil and coddling the energy companies to record breaking profits year over year. 

Yes Mister President, you are correct.  This is not some distant vision for America and we must end our addiction to fossil fuels.  If you’re serious about America’s future and our standing in the global community with regards to our environmental impact, make that change, the change you promised us.  Let’s put American money to work in America, all 365 billion of it.  From rebuilding our infrastructure and renovating schools to finally fixing that section of Flatbush Avenue that pisses me off from Ditmas to Foster, there’s a lot we can do.  New jobs, new technology, new industries leading to a renaissance of American power and believe it or not, it all starts with the recycling of a single soda can.  We all have to pitch in and make a difference.  Let’s get to work.

Relationship? It is what it is…

Warning, this post includes some real talk with some rough language.  By continuing to read this post, you are relinquishing your right to complain about anything.  I am not a certified counselor although I’ve given my fair share of advice, sometimes even when sober.  This post is not designed to replace any of your self help books, your newspaper advice columns, your Ouija boards, etc.  This post is just a rambling of ideas.  If you would rather pretend that your relationship is perfect or cannot accept that your viewpoint on some topics may be wrong, then move on.   If you enjoy a lighthearted piece with some strong language then by all means, thanks for stopping by.  Carry on.

So, the other day I happened to overhear a conversation between 2 young women discussing their relationships.  Girl A is low to mid 20′s.  Girl B appears slightly older although from her ‘words of wisdom’, she’s an intellectual infant.  Girl A is talking about her new boyfriend and how she really seems to be falling for him and how he really seems to care about her.   Girl B cuts her off and proceeds to lay on her some words to live by.   Note: The word ‘guy’ has been used in lieu of a certain term starting with the letter N.   I’m fairly certain you can figure it out.

“Guys ain’t shit.  Get what you can, and move on.”  Um, what?  Now while that caught my attention what came next had me wanting to follow them around with a tape recorder.  “A guy gotta work for every kiss and shit. I mean, he ain’t even seeing a tit without buying me something.”

Folks, I kid you not, this is an actual conversation in a very public place.  Girl A just nodded her head at Girl B and I couldn’t catch what else was being said.  I have no idea if she agreed with what her friend told her or if she stood up for the principles of young love.  Either way, it’s pretty sad this mindset exists society today.  I’m not saying all relationships are like this but its prevalent enough to mention.   I think this younger generation has no idea of what it takes to make a relationship work, although in all fairness the older generation hasn’t exactly set the best example.  So before you think I’m just getting on the girls, I’m not. Fellas, ample times we’re at fault too with our lack of attention and objectification of women based solely on a set of D’s… or Double D’s .  Mmmmm.  Sorry, I digress.  The question now has to be asked, who do we blame for this breakdown of relationship building skills?  Lucky for you I’ve got the answer. Lil Wayne.

First things first, the following is impossible: you can’t do anything sub par or give just the bare minimum and somehow expect everything to be perfect.  That pertains to all aspects and every facet of the relationship.  You know by now (or if not, you should quickly try and figure out) what each others needs are.  Guys, if you know your woman needs to feel special and appreciates flowers and hugs, get on it.  Ladies, if you know your man works hard and needs a little assistance alleviating the day’s stress, get on it.  The word that almost never comes up is compromise, like it’s such a dirty term.  On the rare occasion it does, it’s tossed about so recklessly that in the end neither party wants to come to an arrangement with the issue.  He wants what he wants, she wants what she wants, no one wants to budge and eventually people are loosening chandeliers reenacting the War of the Roses.  Time and time again I’ve seen, I’ve heard, I’ve experienced first hand the selfishness that so readily appears between a couple.  I can’t speak for all guys but yeah, I can be stubborn at times.  Even though I can now acknowledge that flaw, it’s taken me a very long time to get to that point.   I’ve learned to come to terms with the fact I’m not perfect.  Pfft, who am I kidding… I am perfect, it’s just society’s lack of progressive thinking that creates this dissonance.

Additionally, it’s important to learn from our experiences, whether good or bad and use them to shape us into a better man, woman, lover, partner, spouse and a better person overall.  If you follow this retarded ideal to enter a relationship with the mindset of “What’s in it for me?” or “You better do what you need to do to keep me”, you need to ask yourself one question.  Who the hell are you?  What are you bringing to the table?  Wait, that’s two questions but you get the point.   You can’t have that attitude if you’re living in your parent’s basement, sans job with no plan for the future.  Dude, get a job.  Call of Duty won’t get you paid.  Yeah, I said it.  Girls, don’t laugh.  How many kids do you have now?  From how many different guys?  And the fact you’re alone is always the guy’s fault?  There’s a saying that the only link between all your failed relationships… is you.  I think we all need to open our eyes a bit and see what’s really going on.  Living the dream is one thing, failing to wake up from it is just sad.

Ladies, if you’re lucky enough to find a guy who’s willing to build the life that you want, you need to ignore that man bashing, preconceived WE, BET, Oxygen, Lifetime, ultra woman’s lib crap.  Whatever happened to a woman being a helpmate for a man?  That hardly seems to exist anymore in this brave new world.  We’ve all heard many stories from our attached friends but this is just one example.  I apologize in advance to my female readers as this may hit close to home but hypothetically, if I worked all day and you were home or got in before I did, why are you waiting for me to step in the door to begin figuring out dinner?  Seriously?  Flipping it – guys, if we happen to get in before our wives or better halves, sitting in our recliner watching SportsCenter with a beer waiting for her to come home and cook is not only impractical, it’s disrespectful.   It’s not about the roles we’re meant to play, its about the union of a couple as a whole.

Women need to understand that we men are a very simple sort that really only need about 4 things to maintain a healthy mindset.  Note, this is not listed in any specific order: Sex, Food, Sleep and “Me time” (this consists of bathroom time, TV time, game time, drinking with the fellas time, driving aimlessly time, hobby time, etc…)   Now, if your interests happen to sync with the activities in our Me time, then by all means we would be more than happy to have you enjoy it with us.  In exchange for these most simplest of needs, a man, scratch that – a real man, will instinctively provide, protect, honor, cherish and love his woman. Now, if you ladies are half assing it, don’t be surprised if more and more Me time pops up and you’re not invited to the party. I mean if you want a guy to do all those things you want him to, show him he’s appreciated in whatever manner you two have figured out.   Guys, we know we’re just as, if not more guilty of half assing it too.   We know our eyes glaze over when she starts talking about her day.  We know at times we can be very harsh with our words and deeds.  Let’s try and make a conscious effort to do better, not just on anniversaries or birthdays…whenever we remember the dates.  It’s amazing sometimes how a simple kind word can change her whole attitude.  The only thing she wants from us is to feel like there’s a connection.  In contrast, all we want is the big piece of chicken.

Not every relationship is destined to work.  I’m not going to get into the intricacies of human behavior as I stated in the beginning I’m just basically ranting.  I’m not talking about issues such as trust, compatibility, religion or any of that.  Feel free to consult your local bartender or clergyman for more information.  I will say this though, abusive relationships do not work, are not worth your time and will only get worse.  That’s emotional abuse and physical abuse… in both directions.  I can’t see myself beating up on a woman and fellas, if you do that’s just pathetic and sad.  You’re the worst kind of person.  The only type of physical abuse should be carried out consensually in the bedroom with a safety word.  Camcorder optional.

I think by nature people are social creatures who deep down crave that slight measure of intimacy by sharing their life with someone.  I guess the moral of the story is that we shouldn’t take each other for granted.  Guys, I promise you… if you don’t treat your woman right and show her how much she means to you, there’s another guy who gladly will.  If your woman handles her business, got a good head on her and is decent then appreciate her as your Queen, in all things, as long as she’s worth it.  Trash is trash and we don’t need it.  Just dump it.

Ladies, as Chris Rock said, you know when your man needs his medicine.  If you think it’s a good idea to ignore certain needs, disrespect him and not treat him like your King,  I can promise you too that there’s a woman out there willing to pick up the slack.  If your man handles his business and does what needs to be done to make your life better then appreciate him in all things, as long as he’s worth it.  If he’s legitimately a useless sack of shit, the same trash is trash rule applies as well.  Just dump it.  If you’re an individual who thinks that there’s no one out there for you – stop it!  I’ve seen some couples that look so hideous that they only belong on the street during the Halloween Day parade.   Not you guys though, I’m sure all my 5 readers are models.  And get this… those couples that look so mismatched that we have to stop and stare, they’re happy as hell.  Maybe even happier than we are, so who are we to judge?  Perhaps there’s hope for us after all. 

Oh and Lil Wayne, you had nothing to do with this.  You just suck.

The planet is going to hell, sorry for the inconvenience…

“I’d like my life back.”

So would the 11 rig workers who died in the Deepwater Horizon explosion that set this environmental catastrophe in motion.  Very little seems to be said of these men and in light of the looming devastation to the Gulf ecosystem I can understand the very faint blip on the radar, but they are still lives lost.  Not to mention the countless marine life either massacred outright in an instant or now dying a very slow and painful death.  What about their lives?  How about the livelihood of the people of the gulf coast who rely on the sea to put food on their table?  What of the financial boom that this time of year brings to the coastal towns as tourists flock south for some rest and relaxation?  If you were to ask BP CEO Tony Hayward it wouldn’t matter because he wants his life back.  True, he issued an apology for his statement a few days after he dared speak those words but it really makes me wonder what kind of insensitive moron could utter them to begin with.  It does not matter that this is the worst environmental disaster this country has ever seen.  It does not matter that the full ecological damage to has yet to be determined to such a sensitive system.  It doesn’t even matter that they have yet to stop the leak.  By the way a “leak” would signify a small stream such as one from a bathroom sink.  This is more like a huge gushing fire hydrant in comparison.  It doesn’t matter that I’m going to be lobbing tar balls off the beach at Coney Island with a 3 iron in a few weeks. What does matter, is that this situation has interfered with the lifestyle that Tony has enjoyed for so long and so, he would like his life back.  Not to be all preachy but the evil that is in the heart of man very easily slips out through the tongue.  No, I am not saying that Tony Hayward is at his core a bad man as I’m not about to judge anyone… unless you’re on Faux News.  What I am saying is that being at the head of a multi-billion dollar operation can slightly skew your view.

Even though the attention is mainly being focused on BP as they are ultimately responsible for the cleanup and management of this affair, we need to be reminded that the rig was also being handled by 2 other entities: Transocean and Halliburton.

Transocean, the world’s largest offshore drilling contractor (according to their website anyway) operated the rig.  Essentially, they rent their equipment and personnel to companies seeking to gain access to the natural resources beneath the earth’s surface, in this case BP.  While Transocean has been in operation in this dangerous business for over 50 years, on the surface there only appears to be about 6-8 serious incidents involving Transocean rigs.  However, according to findings by the Wall Street Journal, the spectacular safety record boasted by Transocean is a little less than stellar especially after it’s 2007 merger of rival GlobalSantaFe.  Since then, based on surveys done by the US Minerals Management Service or MMS, Transocean’s ratings have dropped in numerous different categories – feel free to look it up yourself.

Now let’s look briefly at the energy colossus known as Halliburton.  You may remember this name being tied to a certain Dick that was in the White House a little while ago.  You might also remember the flurry of scandals surrounding the Halliburton name regarding “Operation Iraqi Freedom”, which is really code for “All your oil are belong to us”.  After the accident one of the first things that Halliburton did was distance itself from the others and released statements such as “it is premature and irresponsible to speculate on any specific causal issues.” In other words, not our fault, keep it moving.  Their role in offshore drilling, to the best I was able ascertain has to do with a process known as cementing.  Basically, massive pipes are set on the seafloor and then cemented down to assist with the placement of the drill.  Cement is also used to seal the space between the well pipe and the hole created to prevent any leakage of oil and gas.  If not handled correctly, this process tends to create some minor problems, such as a rig burning down.  If that seal is shoddy, gas can easily escape and create chaos on the rig above.  Less than 20 hours before the fire that doomed the Horizon, Halliburton finished with their cement work on the well.  Seems a touch coincidental, no?  A 2007 study by the MMS determined that cementing was the single most important factor in 18 of 39 well blowouts in the Gulf of Mexico over a 14-year period.  A few of those had the Halliburton name tagged with them.  Notably in August of last year a rig off the Australian coast in the Timor Sea caught on fire, which contaminated the water with approximately 6 million gallons of oil over ten weeks.  By the way, the actual total is unknown as the corporations tend to downplay the figure and the environmentalists exaggerate.  Halliburton’s cement job was also implicated in this disaster.  While this procedure is necessary to deep water drilling and could possibly result in the disasters similar to Horizon one has to ask, with the corporate image that Halliburton has, could there have been any cost cutting measures or simple gross negligence that added to the risk?  I suppose the federal investigation will determine that.  Oh wait, probably not.  I keep forgetting how deep the oilman’s pockets go.

To his credit President Obama has mustered up his angry face whenever speaking about this disaster however everyone is a critic.  People say that the administration has not moved quickly enough and that the government is not fully disclosing the true extent of this damage.  Since when is that new?  If you expect the government to ever follow “full disclosure” you need to be medicated.  I’m not concerned with what more the Obama administration could have done.  I want to know what is going to be done in the future to respond to such a disaster.  It frustrates me that even though its commonly known that wells can break down, rigs explode and oil pollute everything that there is no concrete way to end such a disaster.  You mean no one at any level has asked “Hey, if this damn thing comes tumbling down and gushes oil, what’s the best way to contain it?”  Oil gushed off the Australian coastline for ten weeks!  Now, I’m no expert (unlike the fresh crop that magically appeared overnight on the tv circuit) so I will not pretend to know and understand the intricacies of underwater robotic work and top kills and whatever but ten weeks seems very excessive for a civilized society.  So far the Deepwater Horizon fiasco has been gushing oil since April 21st and has yet to be completely contained.  I would like to think that as new technology is created to rape the planet, we should at the very least get her a proper grief counselor and do the right thing by cleaning her up afterward in a timely manner.  She deserves better than being tossed a towel and being told to wipe off.

Tony, the planet would like it’s life back too.

If you don’t look… you can pretend it’s not there.

Why does it seem that with everyday that passes I become slightly more disappointed with the direction this country is headed?  While I feel our foreign policy is not nearly tough enough on certain parts of the world and our trade practices confuse me from time to time, I am not discussing anything specific about this administration.  Except maybe for it’s lack of balls.  What I’m talking about is the issue of race and regardless of the different ways people make their hatred appear innocent and justified, it is a very scary and slippery slope we walk. 

First, we have the idiocy that Arizona is carrying out with SB 1070.  In an effort to protect this great land from everything that makes America so great, the Grand Canyon State wishes to divide itself even further…this time from reality.  How shameful is that?  For those of you unaware of what’s going on or only getting your news from low trafficked blogs, SB 1070  in a nutshell is a radical immigration law aimed at cutting down the illegal immigrant population.  This law grants the police sweeping powers to stop, detain, arrest and eventually deport anyone who cannot prove to be an American citizen or have their papers showing they are here legally.  Mind you, these papers or proof of visitation have to be on you at all times as it will be a state crime to walk around without them.  The police, if they have a reason, can stop and demand to see your papers at anytime.  This is a racial profiling lay-up.  You cannot blame certain cultures for being doubtful and mistrusting of the police and their intentions when they find themselves being harassed for no other reason than looking like you’re of Mexican heritage.  If this sounds vaguely familiar, it should.  This was a common practice in parts of Europe during the early 1940′s… need I say more?  Whatever happened to America’s tolerance or her ability to allow people the opportunity to make a better life for themselves without living in fear of this type of prejudice and prosecution?  While I am not at all condoning the act of slipping into the country illegally, there is still something to be said of a country that droves of people risk their lives every day to get to.  America has always been a beacon of hope and what Arizona is doing is turning off the light.  Which coincidentally, Arizona threatened to do with the city of Los Angeles if their council proceeded to go forward with any type of boycott towards the state.  Arizona’s powerplants account for about 25% of electricity provided to LA.  My mother has a saying, “You can’t be wrong and strong at the same time” but this goes beyond a simple display of feathers, this is an affront to our right to voice an opinion and our right to protest.  What are they thinking?

Just when you thought, ‘Gee, I wonder just how much more discriminatory we can get?’ I submit for your consideration – Texas.  Yup, the Lone Star state has proven that everything’s bigger in Texas, even the heaping servings of racism.  The Texas State School Board has declared that they intend to update the curriculum by sending our country backwards.  Again it seems that the right-wing of American politics has struck again.  Once these textbooks have been updated, Texas schoolkids will be learning new and exciting things such as country music being a vital cultural movement, about the importance of the National Rifle Association with regards to upholding the US Constitution and ‘founding father’ Thomas Jefferson wasn’t really that special because of his secular beliefs.  Doesn’t matter that he drafted the Declaration of Independence or was one of the core minds that helped design the framework for this country.  His “Separation of Church and State” ideals is what the over Evangelic right-wing used to justify his removal as an important historical figure. 

What?

It gets better.  Joe McCarthy was a national hero.  Newt Gingrich is a great American who is worthy of study.  The speeches of Jefferson Davis (you may know him as the happy, slave owning president of the Confederacy) should be memorized and honored just as the ones by Honest Abe.   No mentioning of the gay rights movement and global warming does not exists.  They will not allow the discussion of it.

What??

I’m not even done with the sweeping list of historical rewrites Texas is putting in place.  They are removing any influence and contribution that people of color have added to this country’s great history.  Hip-hop is not significant. The Battle at the Alamo will only mention Davey Crockett and not the sacrifices of the Tejanos who died that day.  The board tried to remove Thurgood Marshall from the history books and even went as far as renaming all mention of the slave trade to the “atlantic triangular trade”.  This was eventually overturned but… really?  The fact that it was initially accepted is what worries me. 

Now, why should we care what one state decides to do?  In this instance, we should all care a hell of a lot.  Texas has the 2nd largest school population of 4.7 million students in the nation behind California.  It’s a simple business model -if they purchase the most textbooks, these books then become bestsellers.  “The books that are altered to fit these standards become the bestselling books and therefore within the next two years they’ll end up in other classrooms,” said Fritz Fischer, chairman of the National Council for History Education.  This sounds to me that we shouldn’t be surprised if in the near future kids in Alabama are taught that slavery never existed and that the civil war started as a dispute over a parking spot. 

California to their credit has banned any of the Texas changes from their curriculum and will review statewide any alteration of their textbooks for anything that mimics them.  That’s over 6 million kids that will not be affected outright by the Texas changes but only time will tell what the true extent of the damage is.  By the way, according to the new changes, America is no longer a democratic society.  She is now a Constitutional Republic.  Please update your lives accordingly. 

I would imagine this would garner massive protests countrywide as our heritage slowly becomes adulterated with nonsense but aside from a few scattered protests, a tongue lashing from the White House and very low publicity on the mainstream news channels… nothing.  Are we content to allow this?  What’s next?  Where are the masses screaming for repeals and the objectification of good ol’ common sense?  Fact is, many of the masses are either not paying attention to what’s going on while hopelessly drifting through the primetime television lineup or perhaps they somehow agree with what’s going on.  I truly hope that America’s apathetic approach to everyday living does not set a dangerous precedent where anything goes and we are just too busy to care.  Remember, turning a blind eye, doesn’t mean you’re not going to fall off the ledge.

Where did it all go wrong?

Today boys and girls, we discuss disappointment.  It’s a sensation that’s quite prevalent in our society today and oftentimes runs rampant and completely unchecked in our lives.  It’s an emotion that everyone regardless of race, creed, sexual preference, religious affiliation or political retardation can relate to.  For example: those dimwitted souls in the Arizona state legislature are going to be very disappointed when all of a sudden they’re faced with the prospect of mowing their own lawns.  Who’s going to clean the bathrooms?  Watch the kids while Mommy and Daddy are off doing big and important racist things?  What to do, oh what to do?

At least once in our lives there’s been a moment of sheer dread and silent horror as we watched the promotion we wanted go to someone who they felt was more qualified.  We’ve all experienced heartache as the person we fell hard for simply decided to reject us or if you’re an anchor with FOX News, witness with a cold sweat as a black man became President of the United States (suck it you teabagging bastards).  It’s our nature in those situations to feel very hurt. Depending on the psychological state of the person receiving the wave of disappointment, it can translate even further into a downward spiral of hate, animosity and depression.  Being disappointed is an inevitable part of life and one i’ve gotten to know dearly.  Trust me, I used to do a lot of sales.  Well, once a sales guy always a sales guy they say and I can honestly tell you that it’s real easy to be disappointed.  I mean how many phone calls can one person make in a day and get cursed out on or how about those late night meetings where you can practically taste the commission check… only to have it whisked away by some idiot who has your client’s ear and advises them in a totally different direction.  It would be so easy to tell you that I handled it all in stride and was never phased by anything but that would be a lie.  Even though this is a blog and anything goes, my 2 reader audience deserves the truth.  I’ve done my share of burying my frustrations in all kinds of vices but guess what – asides from me now being a well rounded alcoholic, I never really gained anything by it.  It got to a point where I trained myself to channel my emotions into something creative or productive.  Ever notice why bands are at their best when the lead singer/songwriter is either drunk, strung out on something or simply just not happy?  It’s because when we’re at that point we as humans are stripped of all the pride and vain notions of appearances.  I suppose in some sad way when we’re truly unhappy, we can be at our best.  Of course I may be wrong but as this is my blog you’re free to start your own should you disagree.

Let’s take a look at what’s going on today.  Pick almost any top news story… how about the failed terror attack on NYC by Faisal Shahzad.  According to many prominent news sources, he sent emails to numerous organizations expressing his staunch disappointment with the state of the Muslim world, whatever that means.  Mind you, this guy was a naturalized citizen of a country he supposedly couldn’t stand, finished his MBA and was working as a financial analyst.  I have to say that totally trumps living in Pakistan as a… actually, what do they do over there?  One would be hard pressed to say that he wasn’t living the American dream for a moment, until disappointment set in which made him question everything, twist his thinking and set him on a path of no return.  And by no return I mean his ass should fry.  Jack Bauer wouldn’t have let him board the plane.  While yes this is an extreme case, it is necessary to show how disappointment can set off such a chain.

Pro athletes tired of their crappy records and disappointed by the lack of endorsement deals turn to performance enhancing drugs, with consequences.   Men and women disappointed with the condition of their marriages or relationships turn to the comforting arms of another, with consequences.  Kids disappointed with their social status may delve into drugs and alcohol, with consequences.  Bloggers with very low readership may decide to bring their work more mainstream to attract the fame and fortune of an internet writer… with consequences.  Maybe.  Fact is, there’s always an option, there is always a choice.  I’m not saying the choice is always clear or easy to make.  I’m just saying that it’s out there.

So, handle your disappointment.  Go plant a tree in a park somewhere.  Pick up knitting.  Buy a puppy.  Start speaking solely in haiku.  The best option however is to simply man (or woman) up and try again.  Get off your ass and try again.  Anything else is uncivilized.  You may not always win, but if you don’t at least attempt to make your life a little better in a positive manner you could end up looking like Nick Nolte.  Hey… I’m just saying.

…is this thing on?

In the beginning… a lot happened.  Even more has happened since then.  Regardless of your belief or point of view on how our lives and daily affairs first got started, you have to admit that there’s something to be said of new beginnings.  From the brilliance of the sun that arrives with a new dawn to the chance to start anew every day, all these beginnings have the potential to manifest into something truly beautiful.  With each new beginning however there must be an ending. The end of something. The end of a relationship. The end of an era. The end of complacency.  It is impossible for there to be one without the other.  This blog is my attempt to end the pathetic, self serving political correctness found on many a page.  This is the beginning of a new series of observations designed to kick start the consciousness that is missing in America today.  You better grab your pair of overpriced sunglasses because I’m about to open the window and let the sunlight in.  It’s gonna be bright.

It’s taken me years to decide to enter the realm of online social networking and even longer for me to grasp this decision to launch a blog.  After all, everyone and their grandmother has a blog.  So who cares about what I have to say?  The internet is filled with people either ranting about the worst movies they’ve seen, epic failures and even something regarding dogs wanting a cheeseburger.  Note: For the record I’m a huge dog lover so any site depicting them in all their silly glory is more than okay in my book.  As for me, all I can do is hope to leave my mark and build a following that takes this blog for what it is, even if what it is has yet to be fully determined.  So, you may as well come along for the ride.  I mean, how many times can you peruse TMZ hoping for more pics of Sandra’s adopted baby?  And no, Bobby Brown is not dead.

Months ago when I was initially bouncing around this idea, a friend asked me why I chose the name Soapbox Rhetoric.  I answered with a fairly succinct ‘why not?’.  Yes, I can very well be a jerk at times even to those who know me but I thought it was obvious.  Throughout history powerful changes and revolutionary ideas have been spread by someone stepping out from the status quo and speaking truth to power when standing atop their soapbox.

Yes.  A soapbox.  I cannot think of a better way to describe the importance of freely speaking your mind in a world where everyone is so damn busy thinking and doing the same thing.  Where’s the voice of reason?  Where’s the drive for true independent thought?  Alas, like some of our civil liberties, it has vanished in the past 40 years.  While I cannot stand behind the hippie ill contrived and misguided agenda of yester-years , the freedom to say ‘Hey! Guess what man, I’m not going to do it your way.  Screw your war.  Screw your oppression and oh, screw you too’ is sorely missing from today’s society.  Have we all been bought out by the mainstream vision for American life because we’ve all bought into the hype that change has come to America?  Here’s a news flash for you.  Change has not come to America.  This is still the same extremely wealthy country that has many of its citizens living in squalor without food and proper shelter.  Many of them living without hope that one day they will be able to overcome this adversity and provide a better life for their children.  What we have instead is the prelude to the passing of a radical immigration law.  Thank you Arizona.  The torch on the Statue of Liberty may as well be removed to reveal a giant middle finger.  Whatever happened to “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free”?  America the brave, America the bold… America the bigot.

Please don’t get me wrong; I love my country.  I was born here and intend to die here.  I’m grateful everyday for the blessings and the side effects that come from the American way of life but let’s be real for a moment.  Just because we have a black president does not mean that the racial underpinning that exists simply goes away.  Rather, it seems to have multiplied.  Almost as like if Glen Beck and Rush Limbaugh were rabbits and they screwed all day creating an abundance of bigoted bunnies.  See, people like the Becks, the Limbaughs, the O’Reillys have their soapboxes and they use it to help propel a vicious and racially charged spin cycle with one true goal on the horizon.  To purge anything that’s not white from being in a position of importance in this country.  I will not intend to use my soapbox for evil but rather just to stand up and voice my observations upon what the hell is wrong with this picture.  Seriously.  What is really going on here?  We’ve got a black president, we’ve got angry white Americans (including that “You lie!” guy from Congress) and so many people too fixated on reality television to pay attention to what is going on.  It’s quite sad if you look at the whole picture.

I decided its time for a call to arms and stand on my soapbox because I have quite a lot to say.  Whether you choose to stick around and hear it is up to you.  This is my virtual Hyde Park.  How’s that for a beginning?